My mind works in mysterious ways. Even to me. Today I asked myself the question, “If my dog was a car, what would he be?” Yes it’s a ridiculous question, but as a kid I had the remarkable ability to visually match a car to its driver. Hear me out.
Occasionally my father and I would go to the local diner, usually for breakfast but sometimes for other meals too. Sitting in a booth by the window at the end of the diner, I could see all of the seated patrons while also having a full view of the parking lot. Looking at each person and each car separately, I would figure out whose car was whose by the way they looked. The guy with the big mustache had a car with a big grille. The woman with eyeglasses would have a headlight configuration styled similarly. The self-conscious balding guy would have a landau roof.
Sitting swamp-backed on the vinyl of the booth, and with my elbows stuck to the formica tabletop, I would wait and watch those exiting the diner to see what car they got into. Just to see if I was right. Eventually I found I could determine almost without fail whose cars were whose. At least back in the 1970’s and 1980’s when I was at the height of my prowess.
No, I’m not making this up, it really happened. Like I said, my mind works in mysterious ways.
It’s too bad that that the skill wasn’t transferrable to picking lottery numbers or table games in Las Vegas. I guess my skills were better utilized elsewhere, like telling you about it in this post. But the adage that people look like their dogs also seems to be true with their cars, which to me is a pretty impressive phenomenon. So if people look both like their dogs AND their cars, why wouldn’t someone’s dog look like their car too?
Fast forward to the present day and my initial question as to what kind of car my dog would be maybe makes a little more sense to you. While I never asked myself the question all those years ago, “If that person was a car, which would it be?” but rather, “What car does that person drive?”, it’s a similar enough question that I think I can pick out which car my dog would be.
So what about my dog? Being a mutt, he looks like about 4 different kinds of dogs taped together. He’s handsome enough for people to mention in passing that he should be in movies. Although he doesn’t have classic good looks, he’s attractively scruffy looking, and he looks like he would be perfectly at home in the desert, which is where he apparently was found as a puppy. Now he won’t go near an un-grassed or unpaved trail or go out in the sun when it’s hotter than 80 degrees.
He’s pretty small, just a tick under 10 pounds. While he’s no purse dog, he’s much smaller compared to many other dogs. He’s also long and slender with long legs made for speed. In fact he’s nearly unmatched for speed except for miniature greyhounds. Otherwise he can outrun anything his size, and most dogs of other sizes as well. Racing other dogs not his objective, he just loves the chase and to be chased.
More impressive than straight-line speed is his maneuverability which is much more cat-like than you would expect out of a dog. The zig-zaggary is so incredible to watch particularly when he’s moving at top speed. He’s just so perfectly balanced, it’s poetry in motion. On top of that, he’s very smart, gentle, and has great manners, so he’s very easy to live with on a day to day basis.
So what car would he be? Well I’m sure you’ve guessed by now. It’s the Porsche Cayman. OK granted the Cayman isn’t exactly scruffy looking but it’s got all of the other elements: small, lightweight, great speed for the size, balance, maneuverability, and attractive. Plus, it has great road manners and is a wonderful daily driver. While it’s not a drag racer, when put through the twisties, it is difficult to top.
Sure, you could get the higher powered, beefier, more expensive, pedigreed and well known 911
Now listen, I just did an honest assessment of what car my dog would be, and after figuring that out, one would expect that if I look like my dog and I look like my car, everything should match up. And wouldn’t you know it does! Although I have the topless (convertible) version. Yes, I have all my hair and generally wear a shirt.
This particular 2007 Porsche Cayman (987) was the one on the market right now that most closely matched my buddy. While it has some years on it, it’s just a young pup with only 24,xxx miles on it, so think: pretty new car. The seller states that this Cayman has the preferred package, 17” wheels, 5-speed manual transmission, Bose sound system, and clean title and Carfax. Car has been garage kept and has never been driven in rain (or snow I presume)…which is why this upstate NY (near Buffalo) car has so few miles on it.
BTW, the engine in this speed racer is likely the 2.7 liter 236 HP flat six, which in all honesty sounds significantly better than my dog’s bark. It also definitely sounds better than the more powerful flat 4 turbocharged engine stuffed into the latest models. Just sayin’. So for 1/3 the price of a new one you can have about 97% the fun. Yes that’s an estimate, but I think it’s a close one. Cheers!
Head on over to the original listing on craigslist HERE for more info.
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